So the one time I actually needed it for academic purposes, I couldn’t find any for the life of me, no matter what terms I googled. WHERE WAS ALL THE PORN?!! My controversial painting project was to partially consist of a vagina, spread eagle fashion, and I needed a source photo, so my painting would be anatomically accurate. “V-A-G-I-N-A,” I typed into image search. Results consisted of pictures of a toybox (ohhhhh, now I get it), flowers, very anatomical-scientific-diagram close-ups, and billboard signs for the Vagina Monologues. “P-U-S-S-Y.” You guessed it; would anyone like to adopt a cat? “C-U-N-T,” and the only results were photos of fully-clothed people with mullets in mom-jeans posing together at Six Flags.

I Just Need a Vagina

For once, at that moment of intense academic, artistic research, I would have relished being bombarded by pop-ups with direct links leading to more direct links, all promising “FREE” live footage of girls-gone-wild, that would ultimately lead me to a screaming, pornographic photo of a big juicy pussy. Was this asking too much?! And then someone sat down at the computer next to me, even though I had specifically chosen the computer directly next to the one that didn’t work (it was only a monitor). Then I felt that I ought to save people the effort of assuming I was getting off on web porno at 11 am on a weekday in a public computer lab, so I left.

 

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